I waited longer than most department stores, radio stations and most of my neighbors. I don’t like the Christmas atmosphere in October. I like to feel the mood…stretch it out and embrace the pilgrims and pumpkin pie.

But whatever. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and my blog is decorated for Christmas…TODAY. You’ve got four weeks of this ‘oh so bright’ look. I think the female character even looks a little like me. Less cleavage, though.

I am spending most of my free time finishing my manuscript which has left little time for my blog. All I can say is, “I’m almost finished!” I say this line all the time, mostly to my husband who has picked up a little female nagging quality that is a mood killer.

 “Are you going to do anything in the house? I’ve did this… And this…” While at first this seemed cute, it is starting to get on my nerves. In the sense of, “Hmm, when did I marry a woman?” I find it difficult to see the amusing quality his nagging used to bring.

I am waiting for him to get his period. It should be any day now.

I say all this in jest, of course. My husband is very supportive. He’s a really great human being with high morals and a huge heart.

He just has a penis, which sometimes gets in the way of all that.

At any rate, I can tell you, I am almost finished with the manuscript!!!!

Cue in: The gates of Heaven open, Angel sing…”Hallelujah! Hallelujah!”

Regular blog posting will resume shortly. Have a Wonderful Thanksgiving!

I am trying to knock out a series of projects in a matter of weeks. I have a deadline with my editor on my manuscript, which has finally starting to go in the right direction. I have a mixture of emotions concerning this project. It is a book I am most proud of.

While I am eager to have people read it, I’m also a bit cautious. It is raw with truth, details of my life I’ve never spoken about.

I’ll be posting later in the day a series of entries…

Stay Tuned.

“Your circumstances does not bring or take away your joy.”

 I’m sure there are a lot of people that can relate to sitting in church and feeling as if the priest is speaking directly to them. This morning was one of those moments in which I wanted to yell out, “How did you know?”

Our circumstances does not validate our joy. Our joy comes directly from God. How easy and simple the truth can be! I’ve been known to change my circumstances, go into hiding, quit everything, just to change the circumstances which brought me pain. It never truly worked and I never understood why.

The absence of pain is not joy.

We bring glory to God by not doing stuff for Him, but seeking joy THROUGH Him.

This morning, I left for Mass with a heavy heart. I was on the brink of tears and found myself talking to God and simply asking, “Why?” Isn’t it funny how we do this? We know the answer, but we ask God anyway.

As if He is going to tell us exactly what we want to hear.

Every single time I have strayed off the path God has shown me to take,  chaos, pain and strife occur. I do not believe it is punishment. It is simply the result of my doing what I wanted to do, instead of what God has instructed for me.

How many times will I stray off the road before I learn?

As parents we instruct our children to do what is best for them. God is the same way. He wants us to have joy and He’s shown us how many times over. It is up to us to follow what He’s planned.

Doing it our way and wishing our circumstances were different isn’t going to bring us joy…

I’m moving aside and letting God lead the way.

2 Timothy 1:12

2 Peter 3:18

“Eden, what would you like for Christmas?”

“An electric guitar.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“What would you do with an electric guitar?”

“I would play it.”

“Oh. I didn’t know you knew how to play an electric guitar.”

“Well, when I was born, you never thought I would talk and walk, but I surprised you, didn’t I?”

I love the stillness of the early morning. The smell of coffee brewing, the only sounds are of my breathing and the tapping on my keyboard.

I have done my best writing in the morning. I feel the Holy Spirit move within the core of my soul more in my early morning talks with my God. It is in the mornings, when the day is new, mistakes are few,  I feel anything is possible.

 How easy it is to be spiritual and ‘good’ early in the mornings when I’m alone. My mouth has yet to get me into trouble, I’ve not been labeled a bad Mom for the day by my children and there are yet to be any circumstances in which I feel angry, hurt,  or lacking in confidence.

On the same note…

I have yet experienced the laughter of others when I’ve said something funny. I have yet to feel the warm embraces of my children and their sweet ‘I love you’s’. I have yet been held in my husband’s arms and been told I’m his everything.

Not yet.

Not this early in the morning.

In the early stillness of the morning, I am just me. Free of emotions and free of the problems of the day. I’m only anticipating the good.

I’m optimistic and welcome the day. The fresh start of new opportunities, solutions to lingering problems, and a confidence I cling to, even when I don’t think I’m able. I will stand firm, despite the wobbling of shaky feet on rocky ground.

 I take a sip of my coffee and smile.

The day still new before 6am, still fresh and calm.

The best time of the day.